Lights Out

"Are you sure you want the lights off?"

A little late to for Megatron to ask that now, given that the room was already dark, Rodimus thought. They had flicked off the lights and had even covered the porthole windows with thick mesh to prevent the intrusion of starlight.

"Absolutely!" Rodimus clapped his hands together, even though he unable to be sure that he wouldn't accidentally smack an unlucky, unseen item between his palms.

"I'm not sure what you're hoping to achieve by this exactly."

All that was visible was the red glow of optics and biolights from where Megatron was seated on the floor. Rodimus had already put blackout tape over his own biolights. Now he just had to apply the tape to his partner, and then they would be ready for fun.

Optics could be turned off when they were actually starting, but the tape was to prevent cheating.

Sure, they could have used blindfolds as well, but this time they had agreed to try without them, using the honor system.

"Overload, obviously."

Duh.

Rodimus shrugged as he unrolled the blackout tape, even though Megatron couldn’t see him like this.

"Yes, but once I find you, that really takes away the challenge, don't you think?” Megatron was such a downer sometimes. “At that point, it just becomes regular lovemaking with our optics off. We could have done that at home."

"It's called 'foreplay.' Look it up.” He sighed. “Also, stop calling it ‘lovemaking.’ That sounds so… cringe. Very unsexy."

And by that point, their arrays with their own bright biolights would be visible anyway. Neither of them were keen to put the blackout tape over such delicate parts of their anatomy. Part of the trick would be keeping panels covered until just the right time.

"You know that I know very well what 'foreplay' is.” True, but not the point that Rodimus had been making. “Besides, I'll still be able to hear you."

"Sure, you will, buddy. Sure, you will."

Rodimus had made the conscious decision to not tell Megatron that he knew about his damaged hearing. He wouldn't mention it and Megatron had yet to mention Rodimus’s own struggles with other things, like keeping on top of his calendar and reports. Rodimus’s relationship with linear time was love-hate at best. In his opinion, their mutual silence on the matter constituted a fair trade.

The odds of Megatron precisely tracking his motions through sound alone were slim. Besides, there was also plenty of furniture still in the habsuite. All sorts of places for sound to bounce off, all sorts of places to hide.

And plenty of random stuff to trip on that they purposefully hadn’t cleared away. An entirely empty room wouldn’t be much of a challenge.

It would be fine, he thought, crossing over to where Megatron waited on the floor.

If anyone tripped, it'd probably be the big guy, which would be fine. He was hard to break. Part of the appeal, really.

"Rodimus, this seems silly."

"It's supposed to be erotic," he answered, pulling the free end of the roll of blackout tape which had managed to stick to itself in the dark when Rodimus hadn’t been minding it.

Besides, in addition to the hoped for eroticism, the dark itself added a fun little sense of danger. Rodimus could pretend he was being chased by a big scary monster. That was always entertaining, especially when he had the best monster he could have hoped for right here, being incredibly well-behaved and patient.

Rodimus ripped off a piece with his teeth and stuck it over the large biolight on Megatron's forearm. With each new piece of the tape in place, the outlines of their frames in the dim glow of biolights and optics began to truly disappear.

"I'm well aware of what it's supposed to be—"

"Though I have to admit, big guy, the backsass is not erotic."

"What a fine accusation from you—"

Rodimus slapped a hand over where he thought Megatron's mouth was, loudly shushing him. Luckily, he mostly got a mouth, but also a bit of nose.

"Not helping, okay? The put downs? Yeah, those aren't sexy. I know you like that kind of thing, but that’s not my jam."

Words like that wreaked havoc on his self-esteem in a way that someone with a mountain of self-confidence like Megatron could just shrug off.

When Rodimus didn't receive an answer, he realized he was still covering Megatron's mouth.

"Oopsie.”

He pulled his hand away, secretly grateful that he hadn't been bitten. Not that he really thought Megatron would bite him out of nowhere, not unless asked.

“So, yeah. We clear on the rules?"

"Understood. Now may we continue?"

"Almost. You still need more tape." Trying not to think about just how much isopropyl alcohol they'd need to dissolve the adhesive later, he went back to slapping tape over every light he could see. "Why do you have such huge biolights anyway? You're using all my tape, you bastard."

The rumble of a heavy, industrial engine turning over in intrigue was his only answer.

"Alright, alright, just keep it behind your panels until you catch me."

With their optics off, every sound was so much louder, so much sharper.

From his current hiding place against the side of a cabinet, Rodimus could hear Megatron methodically poking about the room on his knees like an old mech who had lost his corrective lenses.

Unfortunately, Rodimus had expected the search to be less… mechanical and more on intuition. It wasn't as much fun if Megatron wasn't making wild guesses and missteps in the dark. This was less erotic than he had hoped.

Perhaps some… incentive to take risks would be necessary.

Rodimus pulled a light-pen out of his subspace and tossed it across the room where it clattered on the floor.

The tense silence afterward was heavy, as though Megatron were calculating. It too behooved Megatron to be as quiet as possible to sneak up on Rodimus, but given his weight there was a limit to how much he could negate the sound of movement. Remaining still was likely his best weapon.

Rodimus’s spark spun at the thought that perhaps he had just given his position away, rather than creating a diversion. What if at any moment now Megatron realized that Rodimus must have been on the opposite side of the room from the sound? Any second now hands might emerge from the dark and seize him.

Well, being caught was the idea but not quite this soon.

He clambered slowly up the side of the cabinet, trying to pull himself on top of it. He took special care to be as quiet as possible, trying to keep his plating from scraping against the cabinet's surface.

It was tricky to find each handhold with his optics off, feeling around slowly. No wonder this was taking Megatron forever.

If Rodimus was lucky, getting on top of the cabinet would put him up high, well out of Megatron’s potential reach.

Just as long as Megatron remained on his knees, methodically searching the room. If he stood up, Rodimus would need a new plan.

Unfortunately, right as Rodimus finally hauled his weight up onto the top of the cabinet, the entire structure shuddered, rattling loudly against the wall and shattering the fragile silence.

Dammit.

Fear and thrill bloomed simultaneously in his spark.

Across the room, he heard the scraping of heavy armor shifting and growing louder. Megatron was closing in on him.

His only option now was to run for it lest Megatron swipe him clean off the cabinet.

As the sound of his “hunter” approaching came nearer, Rodimus leaped off the cabinet in the direction of the noise, intending to vault right over Megatron. He would be forced to turn around to resume the chase, buying Rodimus more time to think of a better backup plan.

Thoughts of flawlessly sailing right over his lover’s head in the dark evaporated right as he collided hips-first into a massive shoulder, folding forward to dangle against Megatron’s back with his arm hooked around the tank barrel.

Rodimus groaned in defeat, the sense of thrill in his spark now thoroughly extinguished.

“… Best two out of three?”